The weedy man with the garnet toupée still sat on his stool by the doorway, smoking his pipe.
"What, you're leaving already?"
"Yes, well, just a quick one," said Addison.
"Oh, 'a quick one'," said the man, what was his name? Ben?
"Yeah," said Addison, "one and done, you know…"
"No, I don't know," said the man, yes, Ben was his name, Ben the Bore. "I'll tell you what I do know. Do you want to know what I know?"
"Sure," said Addison.
"What I do know is you yourself don't look like the one-and-done type. You look more like the drink until you run out of money or people to buy you drinks type to me."
"Um –" said Addison. Was he really that transparent?
"And as for you," the man addressed Milford, "you strike me more as the sit sullenly at the bar downing beer after beer until the bartender throws you out at 4 A.M. at which point
you stagger into the nearest alleyway and pass out in a pool of your own piss on the cold cobblestones amidst the garbage and rats type."
"Uh –" said Milford. Was it really that obvious?
"What's the matter," said the guy, "this place not 'exciting' enough for you two?"
"No," said Addison, "it's not that –"
"Not enough brilliant repartee for you gentlemen here?"
"Look, sir," spoke up Milford, "we're just leaving, all right? There's no law saying we have to stay here, is there?"
"Not that I know of," said Ben the Bore.
"Well, then, good night."
"But can I just say something?"
"Okay," said Milford, sighing, for the twelve-thousandth and thirty-fourth time since he had awakened long ago the previous morning from a troubled sleep into a more troubled wakefulness.
"Why are you sighing?" said the man.
"Don't mind Milford," said Addison, "he sighs quite often."
"I hope I'm not boring him," said Ben the Bore.
"Oh, I'm sure you're not," said Addison.
"Am I boring you, Milforth?" said the man, to Milford.
"My name is Milford, and, yes, you're boring me," said Milford.
"Well, that's just too bad, young fellow, because I've got something to say, and you're going to have to listen to it."
"All right," said Milford, putting his fist to his mouth to stifle another sigh.
"I just want to say," said Ben the Bore, pausing and pointing the mouthpiece of his pipe at Milford, and then at Addison, "I only wish to say that I hope you two fellows don't think you're better than us."
"We don't, we assure you," said Addison.
"Then why may I ask are you leaving when you just got here?"
"We have to go somewhere."
"Where?"
"To another bar."
"Another 'bar'?"
"Yes."
"What other bar."
"It's called the Hideyway I think."
"The Hideaway?"
"Yes, that's it."
"That's a Negro bar."
"Yes, we're aware," said Addison.
"You're not Negroes."
"Of that we also are aware."
"Then why are you going there?"
"Listen –" said Milford, "Ben is it?"
"Yes," said the man. "Ben. Ben the Bore. I'm surprised you remember my name. Most people don't. And I suppose you know why."
"Because you're so boring?"
"Yes. Which is why I am called Ben the Bore. Not Ben the Exciting Guy. Ben the Bore. And I am okay with that. But you were saying something? Or about to?"
"Yes," said Milford, "but now you've bored whatever it was I was going to say right out of my head."
"And for that I apologize. See? I may be a bore, but at least I'm polite."
"Uh," said Milford.
"Boring but polite, that's me," said Ben the Bore.
"Yeah," said Milford. "Oh, wait, now I remember –"
"Remember what?"
"What I was going to say."
"Please say it then. See, I said please, because I'm polite."
"Okay," said Milford, "what I was going to say was, and no offense intended, but what business of yours is it that we're going to a Negro bar or any other sort of bar?"
"Oh," said Ben. "Wow."
"What do you mean?" said Milford.
"What I mean is, wow, the arrogance."
"How is what I said arrogant?"
"Because you're implying that I am overstepping my bounds simply because I find it shall we say curious to say the least that two gentlemen as blatantly Caucasian as yourselves would want to go to a Negro bar, but you won't stay and enjoy yourselves here, with your fellow members of the European ethnicities."
"Here's one reason," said Milford. "It's that everything about this place is boring, and annoying, including you. The whole place reeks of tedium. Even the bartender told us we should leave."
"He did, huh? That's Joe for you. Well, I'm sorry he said that, and I will have to have a word with him. We can't have him scaring away customers that way. So, look, why don't you fellows go back to the bar and just have another drink, maybe get something to eat. If you don't want the baloney and American cheese sandwich on white bread special, you might consider the peanut butter and jelly on white bread, that's pretty good."
"Sorry, we're going," said Milford.
"So what you're saying is that it's really just too boring for you here."
"Yes," said Milford, "it's too boring here."
"That hurts," said Ben. "And you know why it hurts? It's because you two look pretty damn extremely boring to me. And if you fellows think it's too boring here, what does that say about this place? About everyone in here? What does it say about me? Yeah, I'll admit it, that hurts. That stings."
"But we really do have somewhere else to go," said Addison. "So don't take it personally."
"Right," said Ben. "The Hideaway. The Negro bar."
"Yes," said Addison.
"I wish I could go there," said Ben.
"Then you should go," said Addison. "It's really quite an amusing place."
"Yeah, I'll bet it is," said Ben.
"So go there sometime," said Addison.
"I did try to go there one time," said Ben. "They wouldn't let me in. And, you know, it wasn't because I was white, either."
"Oh," said Addison.
"No, it wasn't because I'm white. It was because they said I looked too boring."
"Let's go, Addison," said Milford, after a pause that was awkward even compared to all that had gone before.
"Sure, go," said Ben the Bore. "I won't stop you."
"Thanks," said Addison.
"Don't thank me," said Ben.
"All right," said Addison.
"Just leave," said Ben the Bore. "But I will say this. Don't come back."
"We won't," said Milford.
"Enjoy the Hideaway. Enjoy the Negro bar. Enjoy the music, and the happy people. Enjoy your capability of experiencing enjoyment."
"We'll try to," said Addison.
"Come on, Addison," said Milford. He didn't want to have to touch his friend's arm again, but he would if it came to that.
"Okay," said Addison. "Good night," he said to Ben the Bore.
"I hate my life," said Ben.
Addison was rarely at a loss for words, but now he was. Milford broke down and gave his companion's arm a slight pat, and they went to the door. Addison opened it, Milford went through, and Addison followed him.
Outside in the dim corridor Addison took one last drag from what was left of his latest Chesterfield and dropped it to the floor.
"Okay," he said.
"Yes," said Milford. "Okay."
He went over and stepped on Addison's Chesterfield butt, grinding it out with the sole of his stout workman's brogan.
"I'm starting to wonder," said Addison. "If we'll ever find our way back."
"Me too," said Milford.
"I mean," said Addison, "should we just give up? Just keep going until we find an exit, and go home?"
Milford paused.
"No," he said.
"Are you thinking of the ladies we left back at the Hideyway?"
"The Hideaway," said Milford.
"Yes," said Addison.
"Yes," said Milford. "I was thinking of them."
"I don't really want to go home either," said Addison. "So shall we continue?"
Right before them was the dim hallway leading back the way they had come, and to the right and the left was another dim hallway, ending in darkness in both directions.
"We should have asked for directions," said Addison.
"Yes, we should have," said Milford.
"We could go back in and ask that Ben guy for directions."
"Yes, we could," said Milford.
"But we're not going to, are we?"
"No, we're not," said Milford.
"Okay, then," said Addison. "Which way?"
Milford looked to the left, and then to the right.
"To the left?"
"Fine," said Addison.
"No, to the right," said Milford.
"Right it is," said Addison.
They hesitated a moment, and then, without another word, turned to the left, and walked down the dim corridor towards the darkness.
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